Monday, February 8, 2010

Test Results

The news was good – I guess pretty darn good. The scans showed that the tumors are, in fact, responding to treatment. Many of the liver tumors can no longer be seen on the scans, and the two larger, scarier ones have continued to shrink. The larger of the liver tumors has been reduced by a little more than half. There are still small (3 and 5 mm) tumors in the chest area, but the bone lesions have disappeared, and there is no new metastasis.

So, the plan is that I continue on the same treatment plan – at least for the next three months. At that time, I’ll have another set of scans and depending on the outcome, the treatment may change.

I know this is all great, and I should be jumping for joy. But the fact is, this is all extending my life a little, and I will be living with cancer for as long as I live. The time bomb continues to tick. This reality hits me when I see the results, (when I really want them ALL to be gone) and when one of the doctor says, you know this is the best we can hope for. I can’t help but get slightly nauseous when I read these reports and scan the internet for explanations.

I actually wrote this several days ago thinking I would be in a better place to write and post about my tests and my state of health. However, when rereading the reports to relay accurate information, it all affected me again. Overall, I’m doing great. My doctor says all my vital organs are functioning perfectly. I generally feel good, with the exception of the neuropathy which gets worse in both my feet and hands, and my nails (hands and feet) are starting to deteriorate.

I’ll continue to try and focus on meditating, healing and killing cancer cells, and pray for another five years and a breakthrough in treating triple negative breast cancer… and living a full life by trying not to waste any day – making each one the best day of my life.

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